1971

WELCOME TO MY CRIB, LADIES.

I was born with a style I call a "Medusa," which is what your hair looks like when you PROPERLY grow it out from a short length. If you have short hair and decide to grow it, it is an irresistible thing to cut that crap out of the way of your face, leaving you with a mullet. Not having scissors available in the womb allowed my hairmeats to flourish nicely.

At the ripe young age of...I dunno...1? I had these badass tiger-striped pants which decreed that mulletiousness was impending even if my hair was still too "Clash of the Titans" to legitimately allow it.

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copyright © 2000 David C. Lovelace